Friday, April 25, 2008

Paris love story III: the biggest porn star in Los Angeles does not eat Hong Kong food

I came back to Downtown with the American guy I met in Paris. But see, the thing is, when you're with someone from a different background, like, an extremely successful porn star in Los Angeles, namely, my new boyfriend, Joe, it's really hard to eat with him. I have no idea what those weird low this low that 0 trans fat things in his fridge are. He said, in order to keep his smoking hot ass and perfect cock in shape, he needed to work out 5 hours a day and only eat organic everything like everybody in California. So when he opened my fridge and found those frogs, chicken feet and pig kidneys, his calls kind of slowed down. Yeah, I know. I'm disgusting. But come on, I only eat snake gulls every other year. The rest of the year, I want these Hong Kong food better than a meal in Ortolan.

Breakfast:

Fried eggs, wheat toast, cold real butter, sausages, fresh vegetables. Can make at home.

1000 years old egg and pork congee. Can make at home. Takes about 45 minutes in a clean morning after a dirty night.

Shu mei. Must go yum cha. Cannot make at home.

Har gau. Must go yum cha. Cannot make at home.



Yogurt + granola. Eat everyday.

Lunch:

Shrimp wonton. A piece of cake. Can make at home.

Salty fish chicken fried rice. Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home.

Tom yum seafood noodle soup. Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home.

Roast goose rice. Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home.

Curry chicken rice. Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home unless Mom's here.

Afternoon snacks:

Fake shark fin soup. (Don't throw eggs on me, they're just bean noodles and mushrooms, not real sharks.) Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home.

Curry fish balls. Must go cha chan tang. Cannot make at home unless you have hours to sink the fishballs in the rice cooker.

Dinner:

A simple salad, preferably spring mix with Italian or blue cheese dressing, no ranch or 1000 island please. My no-brainer.

Steamed vegetables and oyster sauce. Preferably pak choi or choi sum. My no brainer.

Steamed garrupa with ginger and green onion. My no brainer.

(For cold weather only) Reserved pork / duck hot pot rice with vegetables. Must go to mandarin dish restaurant. Cannot make at home.

Movie snacks:

Cheese. Usually get it from Downtown's Ralph's.

Fried chestnuts. Can buy at the entrance of Chinese or Japanese supermarkets.

8 comments:

Bob Pielke said...

I...shall we say..."arise to the occasion" for genuine salt-and-pepper shrimp [the entire shrimp please!!].

Now that I am "officially" a Chinese person [of interest], I deserve no less!!

;-)

frank said...

Joe said THAT?

Downtown Chick said...

Oh his smoking hot ass and perfect cock? Yeah!
;-)

Bob Pielke said...

What about my smokin' hot salt & pepper shrimp and my perfect Chinese-a-tude?

Downtown Chick said...

Bob, you can't really bribe me with your converting to Chineseness okay? Although I believe you're genuinely interested in the shrimps, I'm pretty sure you're not that into staging riots and killing followers of others' faith.

Actually none of these shrimps're that big, speaking of prawns, hm...
;-)

Bob Pielke said...

"I'm pretty sure you're not that into staging riots and killing followers of others' faith."

Certainly not....but I'm sure there must be some Chinese who find their gov't's actions repulsive. [I think I've see some in the news.]

One of my former colleagues couldn't go home after Tienamen Square in 1989 -- he and his wife were deemed "dissidents."

This is the kind of "Chinese-ness" that I admire.

Downtown Chick said...

I'm sure there must be some Chinese who find their gov't's actions repulsive.

Right, and quite possibly they end up losing their jobs, in jail or just disappearing together with their boyfriends and dogs at night...
:-/

Argh, let's go back to the shrimps, what'bout them again?

Bob Pielke said...

Ahhhh....the smokin' hot Salt & Pepper Shrimp -- a literal as well as a gastronomical aphrodisiac.

Feed me such, and I'm yours forever!

;-)

;-)