Do you remember how it was to put on your clothes and leave the guy's place after sex? I do. It sucks. He did not ask me to stay over.
Many times. And I would keep going back again and again and again, like I had nothing else to do. That's right. I really had nothing else to do. I was hoping he would first start seeing me during the day, doing things with me and finally telling me to stay over after sex. Then we would start going out and knowing each other's friends and families. Maybe after a few years, when he's ready, we could even get married, buy a house in the Westside and have a couple of beautiful kids. Yeah, something like that. We would have dark oak floor and some bronze chandelier on the ceiling. The kids would learn swimming in Catalina and love skiing in Tahoe in the winter. When it's their term break, we would travel to Europe or Asia. Of course, they would speak French and Chinese. I would make them to. And then I would be a somewhat successful whatever and my husband a very successful whatever. We would not get fat. No, we would not. I would still look like in my 20s when I was 49. We would eat good and healthy organic food although once in a while I would make some traditional Chinese meat dishes or whatever food he loved that tasted just heavenly in my lovely modern kitchen. Oh boy, I almost forgot! We would pair wine with the food too! Although he was kind of playing the field, since he had settled down with me, now he would not mess around or have an affair. He would have learned how to treasure me and what we had. Our sex would have slowed down a little through time but we would change to best friends of each other's and never part. We would both volunteer for the starving children or something on Christmas Eve and attend dinners with other happy married couples.
Yeah, that was my plan. Why would he change? Because I loved him so much. Makes sense right? Eventually he's going to figure it out. I know what you are gonna say but you don't know. You don't know what it is like when you are in love with somebody.
It would just take one step to start - that he was to ask me to stay over after sex. My life would be fulfilling. I would find love. Life would be beautiful.
I am glad he didn't ask me to stay over. With the awakening after putting on my clothes and going home from his place quite some time ago, my life is fulfilling. I have found love, and life is beautiful - without him, the kids, the jobs, and the fucking annoying fake friends.