Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Our unfuckable all-about-me Chief

I got a promotion! Yay!

Um, no, okay, this is a really badly written humor blog that you are reading, because apparently, I'm just tryin' to find something to write about out of my ass. Of course, the truth is, I was laid off, along with thousands of Americans, at the end of 2008, as you all know.

So, what have I been doin'? Well, you think you can try to catch me right? Yeah right, you successful stalkers, the truth is, I ain't tellin' you! But what I can say is, along with my faith (yes, crazy women believe in something too, just not like yours, you jerks!), I thought it was actually life's decision to put me in another industry which if I didn't get a kick of it, I would never really take any action for - namely, the non-profit crap.

What's weird about non-profit is, unlike what you usually associate to the picture of a bunch of passionate, transcendent, awakened people like the cashiers in Trader Joe's dressed in vintage T-shirts and jeans, the concept of "non-profit" itself isn't even related to "profit" at all! Yes! Why would I say that? Well, because although by law it is not about business profit, it is in itself all about everybody's personal profit. It's something a little similar to what you know about our 2nd-term mayor, Villaraigosa. Have you all read his schedule obtained by LA Weekly? No? Okay, it's right here. It's a PDF file. Click and read it. This fucking loser does not hold any regular meetings with his department directors. He does not do shit. 11% of his time is dedicated to the City of Los Angeles, and the rest for himself, a wannabe successful politician. Am I surprised? No, because I have one right where I work at these several months too. Ironic, isn't it? You claim you want to serve the people does not mean you are really there to. It's all just bullshit about non-profit.

I have no idea why playing politics is so appealing to some people, but apparently, lots of wannabe politicians strive for that. Ever heard of some complete losers with no idea what they are doing and spends 99% of their time on "networking"? Bingo! What is "networking"? Let's cut to the chase, it means excuses to avoid actually working. Let me tell you, the difference between "networking" and "meeting" is that, "networking" means unlikely result, and "meeting" means possible result. Let me give you an example, do you really want to go through the lists of guys I met through "networking" that just wanted to get in my pants and nothing more? Aw, good! You got it! "Networking" is complete nonsense if you know anybody that would even bother to put it on his work schedule. If it is a woman, hm, yeah, okay, if she's actually hot, maybe she is really doing her job. If it's a man, especially a man who is unfuckable, I'm sorry, but he is a fraud, honey.


Anonymous said...

I would like to network with you, all night long, and into the morning, and, well, forever.

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